Why is it the worst that motivates us?

The last month kicked my butt, literally.  I was out on my duff for the last month with just barely enough energy to keep my eyes open watching Annabelle.  The entire house went down.  Her naptimes were spent either sleeping or watching Leverage, because I had no energy.  No clothes put away for about a month and there was a stack five across and about three feet tall in the laundry room.  I did have enough energy to wash, dry, and fold for some reason.  The house was getting dirty and luckily the housekeepers showed up just before it was declared inhabitable.  Dinners consisted of bowls of cereal or pizza from the deli at our grocery store.  But I didn’t want to write about something so revealing.  I didn’t want to tell anyone how sacked I was from being pregnant.  I didn’t want to complain about it, I thought it might make it worse.  I thought a lot about writing something, but I couldn’t make it to the computer.  I barely wrote any return emails.

The day of rescue came around the end of September when my parents came for my birthday weekend.  It was the best present ever.  My dad could only stay the weekend, but once he left, my Mom went into high gear.  We cleaned out the garage, tossed old stuff, and reorganized and labeled everything.  My Mom got to go to the ultrasound appointment with me, where it was confirmed we are having a boy.  It was a fantastic two weeks.

Then, I got sick again.

I hate being sick.   It drives me absolutely batty and normally I can get rid of it within a few days.  The congestion lingered and and lingered until finally I wondered if maybe it was something more serious like Whooping Cough.  I wasn’t able to sleep at night due to my coughing and Annabelle was starting to get a cough.  Nothing really bad.   My neighbor mentioned that pertussis is running rampant in the state of Washington right now (see here for a graph between 2011 and 2012) and I sort of freaked.

Of course I freaked.  I did two things immediately:  made a pediatric appointment and cleaned the house from top to bottom with hydrogen peroxide (HP) and vinegar.  HP is used in hospitals as a disenfectant *oxidizing agents.  (Side note:  You’ll need two bottles.  The first should be a mix of 1/2 vinegar + water and the second should be a mix 1/2 bottle of HP + water + lavendar and/or euclyptis essential oil.  First spray the HP solution, wipe it down and then spray the vinegar.  Spray down all doorknobs, handles, stairwells, and basically anywhere people touch a lot.  This will kill germs like crazy, don’t mix the vinegar or HP as they will ‘cancel’ each other out.  Also, keep the HP in a dark bottle, as it loses efficacy when exposed to sunlight.  Don’t forget it can whiten too, so be careful around fabrics.   Last but not least, the HP mix is safe enough to spray in the air.  That’s what I did to keep the transfer of germs from coughing/sneezing to a minimum).

Turns out, we don’t have pertussis, thank god.  I was vaccinated last year and Annabelle just got hers about two weeks ago.  I always thought I was on the side of not vaccinating, but seriously the vaccination myth linking to autism was debunked.  While I do think further research should be done to find out why there is such a huge increase in autism, I would rather err on the side of caution in regards to vaccinations.

That is what is so damn hard about being a parent these days:  an overwhelming amount of contradictory information.

It’s scary as hell though, to think that I could harm my baby by vaccinating her or I could harm her by not vaccinating.  WTF and how does one even begin to rationally respond to all the contradictions?  I still have no idea and basically I focus on the present day at hand.   On a more positive side though, I feel much more motivated and have a lot more energy, the cold seems to have turned a corner although I still have quite a bit of congestion, I’m not coughing anymore.  Anyways, onwards and upwards and back to posting.  Yawn, well, actually, I’m back to a nap.


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